The
CHEAT's
APOLOGY
.
By
Mr.
ELLIS
.
'Tis
my
vocation
,
Hal
!
SHAKESPEAR
.
LOOK
round
the
wide
world
each
profession
,
you'll
find
,
Hath
something
dishonest
,
which
myst'ry
they
call
;
Each
knave
points
another
,
at
home
is
stark
blind
,
Except
but
his
own
,
there's
a
cheat
in
them
all
:
When
tax'd
with
imposture
the
charge
he'll
evade
,
And
like
Falstaff
pretend
he
but
lives
by
his
trade
.
The
hero
ambitious
(
like
Philip's
great
son
,
Who
wept
when
he
found
no
more
mischief
to
do
)
Ne'er
scruples
a
neighbouring
realm
to
o'er-run
,
While
slaughters
and
carnage
his
sabre
imbrue
.
Of
rapine
and
murder
the
charge
he'll
evade
,
For
conquest
is
glorious
,
and
fighting
his
trade
.
The
statesman
,
who
steers
by
wise
Machiavel's
rules
,
Is
ne'er
to
be
known
by
his
tongue
or
his
face
;
They're
traps
by
him
us'd
to
catch
credulous
fools
,
And
breach
of
his
promise
he
counts
no
disgrace
;
But
policy
calls
it
,
reproach
to
evade
,
For
flatt'ry's
his
province
,
cajoling
his
trade
.
The
priest
will
instruct
you
this
world
to
despise
,
With
all
its
vain
pomp
,
for
a
kingdom
on
high
;
While
earthly
preferments
are
chiefly
his
prize
,
And
all
his
pursuits
give
his
doctrine
the
lye
;
He'll
plead
you
the
gospel
,
your
charge
to
evade
:
The
lab'rer's
entititled
to
live
by
his
trade
.
The
lawyer
,
as
oft
on
the
wrong
side
as
right
,
Who
tortures
for
fee
the
true
sense
of
the
laws
,
While
black
he
by
sophistry
proves
to
be
white
,
And
falshood
and
perjury
lists
in
his
cause
;
With
steady
assurance
all
crime
will
evade
:
His
client's
his
care
,
and
he
follows
his
trade
.
The
sons
of
Machaon
,
who
thirsty
for
gold
The
patient
past
cure
visit
thrice
in
a
day
,
Write
largely
the
Pharmacop
league
to
uphold
,
While
poverty's
left
to
diseases
a
prey
;
Are
held
in
repute
for
their
glitt'ring
parade
:
Their
practice
is
great
,
and
they
shine
in
their
trade
.
Since
then
in
all
stations
imposture
is
found
,
No
one
of
another
can
justly
complain
;
The
coin
he
receives
will
pass
current
around
,
And
where
he
is
cousen'd
he
cousens
again
:
But
I
,
who
for
cheats
this
apology
made
,
Cheat
myself
by
my
rhyming
,
and
starve
by
my
trade
.