THE
CUB
,
AT
NEW-MARKET
.
POETS
,
for
most
part
,
have
been
poor
;
Experience
tells
us
;
—
Proof
too
sure
.
"
Ay
,
may
be
so
,
"
Lord
RICH
exclaims
,
Who
Fortune's
Will
incessant
blames
,
"
It
may
be
so
;
but
yet
,
confound
'em
,
"
They
still
have
Jollity
around
'em
.
"
PRAY
,
my
good
Lord
!
—
'tis
no
Offence
To
ask
by
rules
of
common
sense
,
—
Is
not
this
distribution
right
?
—
At
least
I
view
it
in
that
light
;
For
'tis
but
just
that
ev'ry
Creature
Should
have
some
favour
from
Dame
Nature
.
RICH
shrugs
his
shoulders
;
—
"
Why
,
perhaps
,
"
'Tis
as
you
say
"
—
then
sudden
slaps
His
fist
upon
his
buff-clad
thigh
,
And
surly
grunts
,
"
Don't
know
,
not
I
.
"
But
come
,
don't
you
your
Promise
fail
,
"
Do
,
give
us
now
that
same
new
Tale
"
Of
Mirth
;
—
'twill
serve
my
spleen
t'
appease
,
"
And
set
my
troubled
mind
at
ease
.
"
I
will
,
my
Lord
!
but
hope
you'll
make
Allowance
for
a
Youngster's
sake
.
"
O
never
fear
.
"
—
Don't
look
so
grim
,
You
seem
dispos'd
my
back
to
trim
;
That
Cudgel
looks
so
wondrous
strong
,
'Twould
sweep
a
dozen
Tars
along
.
"
POH
!
Poh
!
this
idle
trifling
!
nay
,
"
Come
,
Sir
,
youdine
with
me
to-day
.
"
BRAVO
!
my
Lord
!
Oh
,
now
I'm
fee'd
,
Wise
as
a
Lawyer
I'll
proceed
.
LORD
E*******N
,
who
has
,
you
know
,
A
little
dash
of
whim
,
or
so
;
Who
thro'
a
thousand
scenes
will
range
To
pick
up
any
thing
that's
strange
,
By
chance
a
curious
CUB
had
got
,
On
SCOTIA's
Mountains
newly
caught
;
And
,
after
driving
him
about
Thro'
London
,
many
a
diff'rent
rout
,
The
comic
Episodes
of
which
Would
tire
your
Lordship's
Patience
each
;
New-market
Meeting
being
near
,
He
thought
'twas
best
to
have
him
there
;
And
,
that
your
Time
I
mayn't
consume
,
View
him
in
the
New
Coffee-Room
!
THERE
soon
his
noble
Patron
gay
Flies
to
his
sportive
Friends
away
:
While
the
Poor
Being
hums
a
song
,
Astonish'd
to
behold
a
Throng
Of
DUKES
and
LORDS
!
—
Bless
me
!
he
thought
;
Enchantment
surely
here
has
wrought
!
SOMETIMES
stock-still
he
stood
amaz'd
,
And
with
a
stupid
wonder
gaz'd
;
Admir'd
at
ev'ry
thing
he
saw
,
Ev'n
Spurs
would
his
attention
draw
;
Much
more
MILITIA
COL'NELS
GREAT
!
The
Bulwarks
of
BRITANNIA's
State
!
Whose
strut
majestic
made
him
shrink
,
As
on
a
Promontory's
brink
:
In
short
,
size
,
colour
,
voice
,
and
shape
,
Made
our
Prodigious
Hero
gape
!
Such
charms
in
Novelty
we
find
,
Such
it's
effect
on
ev'ry
mind
.
SOMETIMES
,
he
,
with
an
awkard
stride
,
Would
lift
his
legs
,
from
side
to
side
;
While
Stars
reflecting
Phoebus'
light
With
beamy
radiance
struck
his
sight
:
Then
,
as
his
visive
orbs
grew
dim
,
Began
to
think
some
look'd
at
him
;
And
Bashfulness
,
he
knew
not
why
,
Brought
tears
into
his
sheepish
eye
.
WHAT
could
the
luckless
fellow
do
?
For
not
a
single
soul
he
knew
.
At
last
a
corner
pure
and
snug
He
chanc'd
to
spy
,
which
made
him
hug
Himself
with
joy
.
—
There
down
he
sat
,
Of
Solitude
fond
as
a
Bat
:
And
like
a
man
at
point
of
death
,
Scarcely
squeez'd
forth
above
his
breath
,
"
Here
,
get
me
Paper
,
Pen
and
Ink
,
"
For
,
Waiter
,
I
will
write
,
I
think
.
"
AND
now
,
my
Story
,
pause
awhile
;
Till
I
,
in
Hudibrastic
stile
,
Attempt
to
give
you
as
I
can
,
The
Portraiture
of
this
Wild
Man
.
HE
was
not
of
the
iron
Race
,
Which
sometimes
CALIDONIA
grace
,
Tho'
he
to
Combat
could
advance
—
Plumpness
shone
in
his
Countenance
;
And
Belly
prominent
declar'd
,
That
he
for
Beef
and
Pudding
car'd
.
He
had
a
large
and
pond'rous
head
,
That
seem'd
to
be
compos'd
of
lead
;
From
which
hung
down
such
stiff
,
lank
hair
,
As
might
the
crows
in
Autumn
scare
.
TWO
hours
thus
studious
past
or
more
;
Afraid
to
venture
on
the
floor
,
He
rather
thought
on
something
new
,
Nor
dreamt
he
any
notice
drew
.
SEDLEY
,
a
truly
worthy
Knight
,
In
whom
strong
sense
quick
parts
unite
,
Whose
humour
of
peculiar
cast
Surprizes
you
from
first
to
last
;
Who
,
tho'
few
really
are
more
wise
,
To
look
a
little
foolish
tries
;
And
likes
Exotics
to
discover
,
As
a
fine
Lady
a
new
Lover
;
To
the
consounded
Put
comes
near
,
Tips
him
at
once
a
friendly
leer
,
And
thus
accosts
him
:
"
How
now
,
Squire
?
"
Why
,
you've
already
wrote
a
Quire
;
"
Yet
still
continue
to
go
on
:
"
What
!
will
your
labours
ne'er
be
done
?
"
'Tis
said
that
you
and
EGLINTOUN
"
Our
History
are
handing
down
:
"
No
doubt
,
'twill
be
a
Work
compleat
;
"
All
former
Authors
will
be
beat
:
"
Out
with
Proposals
—
for
my
share
,
"
I'll
instantly
subscribe
,
I
swear
.
"
JUST
in
the
moment
as
he
spoke
,
The
sprightly
PEER
,
with
switch
of
oak
,
Popt
in
his
nose
—
"
Faith
,
good
enough
,
"
Sir
CHARLES
my
friend
!
You
Jockey
bluff
!
"
We'll
give
you
leave
—
no
favour
light
—
"
Here
to
throw
in
a
willing
mite
.
"
You
,
to
Parnassus
who
resort
,
"
And
the
Pierian
Ladies
court
,
"
Come
,
touch
us
up
a
sketch
in
rhime
,
"
And
shew
your
genius
—
now's
the
time
.
"
To
the
best
The
best
Justice
—
Mr.
P
—
N.
JUSTICE
in
the
Nation
—
"
The
Squire
I
mean
—
make
Dedication
;
"
And
I
,
who
have
a
knack
that
way
,
"
Will
whistle
Notes
to
what
you
say
:
"
Nay
,
more
,
in
attitude
burlesque
,
"
Will
draw
the
The
Caliban
—
An
Appellation
sometimes
merrily
bestowed
on
a
very
sensible
worthy
Member
,
who
loves
a
jest
himself
;
and
who
admires
the
equitable
Practice
of
Give
and
Take
,
CALIBAN
grotesque
;
"
Who
in
the
Frontispiece
shall
stand
,
"
And
,
ludicrous
,
your
mirth
command
.
"
THIS
last
Design
was
scarcely
broach'd
,
When
,
lo
!
the
MONSTER
fell
approach'd
!
The
Justice
in
one
arm
he
lugs
,
And
the
thin
Spectre
onward
tugs
.
OUR
CLOWN
(
like
country
mouse
of
old
,
'Bout
which
in
HORACE
we
are
told
)
Quak'd
timid
,
as
,
with
horrid
grin
,
He
saw
HIM
shake
his
triple
chin
;
Th'
affrighted
Animal
would
skulk
,
And
hide
him
from
th'
ENORMOUS
BULK
.
YOU'll
easily
believe
,
My
Lord
!
That
this
could
no
small
fun
afford
;
And
set
—
nay
call
me
not
queer
Dog
—
Their
Gelasticity
agog
.
AT
first
the
circle
held
but
few
;
Till
,
as
the
loud
laugh
stronger
grew
,
DUKES
,
LORDS
,
and
COMMONS
fondly
join'd
,
Eager
the
mighty
joke
to
find
:
Not
one
of
'em
a
sentence
spoke
,
With
peals
of
laughter
like
to
choak
;
Each
as
he
came
th'
infection
seiz'd
,
And
by
his
friend
behind
was
teaz'd
With
"
What's
the
matter
?
"
—
All
at
once
,
The
friend
behind
turns
equal
Dunce
.
IN
short
,
the
Hounds
,
when
in
full
cry
,
Ne'er
struck
with
so
much
force
the
sky
,
As
this
blithe
Chorus
did
assault
The
Coffee-Room's
resounding
Vault
.
MEANTIME
,
Sir
CHARLES
,
who
seem'd
to
pry
Into
the
Jest
,
with
aspect
sly
;
His
visage
veiling
with
a
gloom
,
Slip'd
to
the
middle
of
the
room
,
Pull'd
half
a
dozen
by
the
sleeve
,
And
whisper'd
each
;
"
You
may
believe
,
"
I'm
forc'd
to
tell
you
what
is
true
,
"
Why
,
damn
it
,
Sir
!
they
laugh
at
You
.
"
AND
now
,
my
Lord
!
—
And
now
,
in
end
,
To
what
does
all
this
Story
tend
?
IF
you're
so
good
as
to
allow
,
I'd
willingly
the
Moral
show
.
"
Ha
!
ha
!
my
Boy
!
with
all
my
heart
;
—
"
You're
now
to
play
a
serious
part
.
"
Wisdom
to
learn
from
such
as
you
,
"
Is
surely
something
very
new
.
"
YOUR
Lordship
here
then
may
observe
,
That
Nonsense
frequently
will
serve
To
set
a
table
on
a
roar
,
And
drive
dull
Sadness
out
of
door
.
From
whence
,
that
Folly
is
at
least
Harmless
,
I
think
should
be
confest
;
And
that
in
life
it
may
be
well
,
Sometimes
to
hunt
the
Bagatelle
.
LIKEWISE
we
see
that
Fate
ne'er
fails
To
weigh
things
in
impartial
scales
:
For
,
tho'
some
People
are
more
blest
,
With
Understanding
than
the
rest
,
She
some
external
Oddity
Bestows
,
which
they
themselves
can't
see
,
Or
some
particular
defect
,
Which
,
while
they
indolent
neglect
,
To
Mortals
of
inferior
sort
,
In
harmless
Satire
serves
for
sport
.
THUS
is
the
Ballance
render'd
even
;
Here
view
the
equity
of
Heaven
.
FINIS
.